


SpicyHoney Cuddle Puddle

by Maniacal_Meeka



Series: The Manic Skeleton Adventures [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Rape/Non-con Elements, Short & Sweet, Sweet, bad things happen, dont drug edge, drabble bin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:40:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28341813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maniacal_Meeka/pseuds/Maniacal_Meeka
Summary: Ok so I'm new at this... please be kind.  This is the new place for my spicyhoney drabbles
Relationships: Papyrus & Papyrus (Undertale), Papyrus/Papyrus (Undertale), Spicyhoney
Series: The Manic Skeleton Adventures [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2075490
Kudos: 7





	1. The Drunken Bastard

“I’ll kick his ass if you want me to…” Stretch casually whispered into his increasingly annoyed partner’s acoustic meatus. Edge laughed, “You and what combat training HoneyPot? I can handle myself, don't worry about it.” He then planted a skeleton kiss to his lover's cheekbone for reassurance. “Believe me, growing up in underfell looking like this, I've faced my fair share of creeps. And while I can’t quite use the same deadly force I'm used to in retaliation anymore, I can still keep myself safe.”

“I know you _can_ but you shouldn't _have_ to. Plus, we both know you ain’t perfect, and sometimes the creep-os get lucky…” 

“Don’t call them creep-os hun, it makes them sound like some debauched cereal.” Stretch giggled, “Creepy-os, now with extra protein!” 

“STRETCH, THAT'S DISGUSTING!” Edge playfully swatted his partner away, “Now go get us some drinks or something, I've got to use the bathroom.” 

“Ok ok” Stretch pressed a kiss to his teeth, “But don’t think we’re done talking about this.” Edge rolled his eyelights, “Wouldn’t dream of it sweetie.” And with that the two parted ways.

As Stretch walked away, he wondered what Edge was going to be doing in the bathroom. After all, Skeletons don't urinate so that left Stretch at a bit of a loss. Until he remembered his Edgelord’s tendency to wear makeup. _Ahh, he must have messed up his eyeliner at some point_ . Stretch chuckled to himself, _He's so damn cute, what in the everloving fuck did I do to deserve him?_ He took a seat at the bar and ordered a couple drinks, his favorite: a Bees Knees Honey Cocktail, and for Edge: a Siracha Screwdriver his favorite. 

As he waited for the drinks Stretch looked around the bar. He didn’t see that jerk from earlier anywhere, thank god, the way he had been talking to Edge, and standing so close to him, while also clearly flirting with Stretch left a bad taste in his mouth. _Where did that guy even get off pulling that shit? And he’s a regular here too, never given us trouble before… uggh maybe we should find a new place for date night? Shit, I liked this place too._ Stretch noticed that their drinks had arrived at least five minutes ago, and yet Edge was nowhere to be seen, _hmmm, If he’s not back in five minutes I'm going to check on him… That's reasonable right? He won’t think i'm being too intrusive or overprotective??_

_Fuck it he’s got five minutes._

As edge touched up his eyeliner in the men’s room mirror he let his mind wander. _It's a good thing I carry makeup remover in my inventory, when this shade of red smudges it won't come off my bones with just water._ He proceeded to touch up his under-socket and re-apply the wing all while mumbling to himself. Suddenly, halfway through the second wing, he saw someone else wander their way into the restroom. The man walked straight to the urinals though so Edge paid him no mind as was the unspoken rule of the men's room.

_Stretch is so cute with that “i'll kick his ass if you want me to” thing, I mean honey, you are the light of my life but I was the captain of the royal guard in UNDERFELL for peat's sake. I can handle some jackass who can’t keep his hands to himself._ Though Edge was pretty sure Stretch hadn't noticed how handsy the guy actually was, thank goodness, or they would have finished date night with a bar fight for the fourth time in two months. Granted three of those happened because apparently edge gets... possessive when he gets too drunk. It’d be a wonder they weren’t banned from the premises if Slim weren't the owner. _I’ll have to thank Razz again for telling us what days his brother doesn’t work, I don’t know what's worse, his jokes, or the fact he won’t leave us alone on our date nights!!_ With that, Edge finished up in the mirror, washed his hands (shut up it's only sanitary) and returned to the bar where Stretch was hopefully waiting. Halfway there, Edge ran into said lanky mother fucker, “I thought I told you to order us some drinks?” 

“And order us some drinks I did, but you were taking too long and I got worried," Stretch booped his nasal ridge, "your eyeliner looks flawless as always by the way” Edge couldn't help but flush and grin at the praise as he let Stretch lead him to their drinks. 

The evening went off without a hitch after that point, with both skeletons smiling, and laughing the entire time, though Edge’s drink left him feeling way drunker than he was used to after just one drink, the bartender must have used a different brand of vodka than normal or something like that, Edge found for some reason he didn't really care. Due to Edge's unexpected tipsiness the couple decided to call it an early night and start the walk home.

Something was up, of that Stretch was sure. It usually took about a bathtub of vodquila to get Edge this drunk, someone must have slipped something into his drink when they weren't looking, but when.... _Shit, they must have done it when I went to go check on him in the bathroom. Fuck, why do I suck so hard? I wanted to keep this shit from happening yet I made the biggest and dumbest mistake and left our drinks unattended._

“Don’t worry babe, I’ll get you home safe” Stretch nuzzled the other more for his own benefit than Edge’s as he was in another world entirely at this point, “HolY SHOoot Strch, I shhoud orderder that moore often I feel sooooo warm and fuzzy and and.. Do you know I luv you sooooOOO mUCh??” The rambling continued in a similar fashion as they walked. “Damnit, I wish I’d noticed sooner, then maybe I could just shortcut us home, But now I'm not exactly sober myself and the last thing we need is to port into a wall, right Spiky?”

“I coold usee a WaLL Righ ABOut now…” And with that Edge knocked them both over. “Shit, come on Edge, Let’s get up- Fuck.” As Stretch looked up he saw the shining sun of his life drugged out of his skull and struggling clumsily against that fucking creep from earlier. Said creep had a knife to his cervical vertebrae and was currently trying to get a hold of his wrists. Not on stretch’s fucking watch he wasn't. Stretch got up and lunged for the fucker only to have his own wrist snatched and his arm twisted behind his back. “GAAHHH!! The f- the fuck are you?!?!” Both skeletons were pulled off into a nearby alleyway. Stretch was slammed against a wall, his vision going fuzzy as he slumped against his assailant. At this point he couldn't tell if his bones were cold because someone was removing his jacket, or because of the hands stroking his ribs. And he found he didn't really care as he completely lost consciousness.

Edge was confused, why was this guy holding a knife to his cervical vertebrae? Where were they going? Where did Stretch go? A sudden chill hit his bones as someone cut open his shirt allowing him one moment of clear thought. Just enough time to notice Stretch just a few feet away unconscious and lacking a shirt. _Wait… that’s… not right? Why are they touching him like… why isn’t he waking up?_ And it was at that moment that Edge noticed the fresh marrow leaking from the back of his Lover’s skull. 

AND

HE 

LOST 

IT

Edge stumbled home carrying Stretch in his arms and wrapped in his leather jacket. Despite his seemingly vulnerable state, no one bothered them for the rest of the night. That might have something to do with the fact that Edge’s teeth, hands, and clothing were covered in blood. His eyelights were bright and blazing, flashing an obvious warning to anyone too dense to take the hint. The dark skeleton didn’t remember if he left those two alive, and he didn't care. _No one fucks with you_ Edge though with conviction as he entered their house locked the all the doors and windows, he then collapsed on the couch wrapping his smaller form protectively around Stretch and sleeping off whatever the fuck those bastards had slipped him.

"No One Else Is Fucking Touching You Ever Again..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So just in case you couldn't tell, after he "Lost it" Edge went ape shit on those two fuckers, he was roofied so he probably won't remember it all (Though he isn't stupid so he'll be able to piece the basic story together) but he fought like an animal, biting clawing and showing no fucking mercy. To offset legal ramifications, Edge did leave them alive, though barely, and they're probably missing a few fingers if not a hand. When they wake up, in the E.R., they tell no one anything out of sheer terror of what Edge would do to them.
> 
> And those two lived miserably ever after drowning in financial debt and medical bills, never hurting anyone ever again.
> 
> Edge and Stretch woke up, showerd, tended their wounds and then ate a nice breakfast courtesy of Stretch.


	2. The Christmas Episode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cozy Christmas Cuddles Shared Copiously in Cute Cavalcade Of Choral Creations

One windy December evening, two skeletons were sitting on a couch in front of their fireplace. The smaller, yet scarier of the two was snuggled under a soft quilt, reading a book. Said quilt was made by the couch’s other inhabitant, who was leaning against the opposite arm, drawing the first skeleton. There was an end table, which held his extra pencils, a cup of water, and a radio. Said radio was currently playing Christmas music, not just any Christmas music, not that gaudy shit that drives retail workers insane, this was soft, quiet, and the perfect ambiance for the couple’s Christmas eve activities. The two continued on like this for some time, simply enjoying their hobbies, the music, and each other’s company. 

After a while, a certain song came onto the radio, Edge’s favorite, Silver Bells. Without even noticing it, he began humming along softly. Stretch on the other side of the couch lowered his drawing pad and slowly turned down the radio, listening to his lover’s low, smooth, voice. When the chorus came about, Edge had stopped humming and began singing, Stretch chuckled lowly as he watched his lover sing his own echo. By the time the song finished Edge had noticed his audience and was now looking at him expectantly. 

Sarcastic applause ensued.

Followed swiftly by Stretch receiving a pillow to the face, delivered express by one Edge “Papyrus” Aster.

After a fit of laughter from the two Stretch asked Edge a question, “So, why is that one your favorite? I don’t think you've ever told me.” Edge’s face turned a little red at that, “Hmmm I’m embarrassed to say…” Stretch poked the others knee, “Well now you’ve gotta tell me Edgy, come on… Please?” 

When Edge looked up his lover's eyes were full of stars and sparkles, “OK ok ok, fine, just stop it with the face.” He released a heavy sigh, “When I was a babybones, my father had one or two CD’s from above ground. Silver Bells was one of the songs in a Christmas album he had, I remember listening to it with my brother over and over again, and imagining what “Christmas Time” on the surface was like. What the song described was kind of like Snowdin just… nicer, more happy, less murdery.” Edge wiped away the tears beginning to form in his sockets, “That song got me through some rough times. Also it's fun to sing with the echo flowers.” 

Suddenly Edge found himself being pulled atop of Stretch and entombed in one of his passionate hugs. “I hope it’s lived up to all that hype.” he whispered as he nuzzled the others skull. “It has Cuddle Bug,” Edge hugged him back “And it's better than I could have ever dreamed.”

  
  
  
  
  


“Do you Have a favorite Christmas song Stretch?” Edge rested his chin on Stretch’s chest so he could see his face, “Well, I always liked “Do You Hear What I Hear”, I don’t really care about the religious aspect though, It's just a pretty song I guess.” 

“Can you sing it to me?” That question caught Stretch off guard, “Aww, Honeysuckle, you don’t want me to sing… It sounds like someone's trying to drown squirr-”

“Nonono no NO.” Edge glared, “You don’t get to pull that after answering _your_ question made me cry. I deserve _something_ to make me feel better and I want to hear you sing.” Stretch laughed quietly, “Ok ok fine you little brat, but you’ve gotta do the echoes and promise you’ll stop me if you get annoyed.” Edge rested his skull on Stretches sternum again, “Deal”

Stretch sighed, “So we’re actually doing this then?”

“Stop stalling and sing already dammit”

“Heh, ok ok”

With that Stretch began singing, it wasn't great, but his gentle tenor sounded nice enough when Edge came in with a bass harmony. But none of that seemed to matter to Edge though, he looked at the other with pure adoration and love in his sockets as he kept singing. Stretch got better as the song went on, and his voice warmed up. Soon the room was filled with the couple’s very own sound, and while it wouldn't win any awards, that wasn't the point. The point was that both parties had never felt more in tune with their partner. That in that moment their souls were beating as one, and when it finally finished the two just stared at each other and smiled.

“We should do that more often” Edge sighed,

“You might be able to convince me…” Stretch clanked him on the forehead, “You’ve got plenty of time to try after all” A puzzled expression came across the smaller's face at that remark. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Edge asked. 

Stretch seemed hesitant to reply, “I don’t know really,” He thought for a moment, “I guess that sometimes this feels too good to be true, like I'm gonna wake up some day and all this will have been a dream. Sometimes I just need to remind myself that this is real, ya know?”

Edge sighed, “Yeah I know, I don’t think I deserve to be this happy sometimes, I’m just waiting for something to come and ruin it, I mean, after all I’ve done…” 

“Shhhhh” Stretch cut him off, “That stuff doesn't matter anymore Edgy. What's important is you did what you needed to survive, you are here, and you are happy, WE are happy. Lets focus on that yeah?” Edge smiled at the other,

“Yeah, that sounds nice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas / Happy Holidays to all my readers. I hope you enjoy my little gift.


	3. Capri-Sun and Candles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stretch has had a bad day, But Edge knows just how to get his Honey-Bear smiling again

One quiet November evening, the tallest of the Papiri was sprawled across his sofa enjoying the ambiance created by the tv, playing some cartoon, and his angry smol partner cooking away in the kitchen. Stretch had considered going in to help, but long ago the two agreed to leave dinner to Edge, breakfast to Stretch, and they would usually wind up having lunch separately, or play rock paper scissors for the privilege on the rare occasion their lunch breaks synched up. Thinking back to his day at work put a bit of a damper on Stretch’s good mood. Things had not gone well at the school today. between his students once again deciding it would be a good idea to try and remove his finger bones when he wasn’t paying attention, (first graders I swear…) And his boss getting all up on his case to finish writing his lesson plans (two weeks before they’re actually due by the way) Stretch hadn’t had a very good day.

Just as he let out a monumental sight, Edge walked in, “Dinner’s ready stringbean” Edge stood in the kitchen doorway looking cute as ever. He was wearing a soft well worn ACDC T-shirt he’d had since the underground, along with some black sweatpants. But what really made the monster in front of him the most precious thing Stretch could think of was the pink apron that declared “I’m a Cutie Pie!” complete with a cute little smiling pie right in the center. Stretch walked over and hugged the physical embodiment of adorable that was currently standing in his kitchen doorway. “You know I bought you that as a joke right Spiky?” Edge became flustered at the sudden hug, and gently tried pushing the big lug away, “I am well aware of that, but you seemed to be having a bad day so I figured I'd make your favorite and try to cheer you up.”

“Dawww sweetheart, how could you tell?” Stretch refused to let go, scooping up his lover into the biggest bear hug he could manage, “Gahh! Well for one I can smell you idiot.” Stretch flushed at that, he hadn't realized he smelled of… herbal stress relief. “And for another thing, (Please put me down now), You only watch queer coded children’s shows (thank you) when you need cheering up.” Edge pointed to the T.V. screen where Ruby was currently proposing to Sapphire with the biggest smile on her little face.

Edge, with his feet now firmly on the ground, took Stretch’s hand and walked him into the kitchen. “Now sit down and eat, I have business to attend to for the time being, but I’ll meet you in the bedroom when you’ve finished” And with that, he speed walked up the stairs all but slamming the bedroom door in his haste. Ok, is everything ready? Edge obsessively checked every inch of the room, making sure every detail was perfect. Blueberry pancake scented candle? Check. Fruit Punch Capri-Sun? Check. Bluetooth speaker ready to play his favorite song? Check. Having everything else accounted for, Edge prepared the piece de resistance, and waited for stretch to come up the stairs.

“Huh, well that was weird” Stretch muttered to himself upon watching Edge’s hasty retreat. That little twerp is up to something… isn’t he? Excited by the mystery of what Edge was up to now, Stretch scarfed down his food. Well, he scarfed it as fast as he could while also enjoying the amazing new blend of spices and cheese that Edge had used. After about fifteen minutes his plate was empty and sitting neatly on the drying rack. Meanwhile Stretch was making his way up the stairs, his anticipation rising with every step he took. After what felt like forever Stretch made it to the bedroom door, only to notice a small parcel with a note attached leaning against it. “Put this on before you enter.”  
“Pfft- real romantic note hun” Stretch mumbled, But he complied with the instructions nonetheless. Upon donning the outfit stretch was left awestruck, he was currently wearing an oversized bear hoodie, complete with ears on the hood, “Where did he even FIND one this big?!?” Stretch had been looking for an oversized hoodie for years, but found it difficult due to his… unusual height. And yet, here he was, practically swimming in a hoodie for the first time since he was 13. “Oh edge, you are about to receive my finest of thank-yous. With that, Stretch paused a moment to flap his arms excitedly, enjoying the feeling of the too-long sleeves flopping about. And then ran straight into the bedroom to tackle his favorite skeleton into the sheets.

Edge giggled as he overheard Stretch’s excited sqee-ing from the bathroom, and he almost cackled when he heard the unmistakable sound of Stretch’s “Happy Flappies” as he liked to call them. Edge was so distracted, he failed to notice the 6’8” skeleton flying towards him at Mach 20 before he was smothered. “OH MY GOD EDGE I LOVE IT THANK YOU SO MUCH AAAAAHHHHHhhhhhhh” Stretch snuggled the other like his life depended on it, nuzzling his face into the crook of his neck as he rambled on, “OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT MY FAVORITE CANDLE?? AND CAPRI-SUNS!!!! I SWEAR TO GOD EDGE I’VE DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH!!!!!” Edge could only smile and laugh as Stretch started flapping his arms in what Edge had decided was the cutest happy stim in existence. After a while, Stretch calmed down enough to think coherently again, “soo, now that I’m feeling better. Stretch loomed over the other placing his hands on either side of his skull, “What on earth am I to give you in return for such kindness?” He leaned in and clanked the smaller, first on the forehead, then on the jawbone, then he licked Edge’s teeth, silently asking for entry. The other complied and met Stretch with his own tongue. As the kiss deepened, Edge wrapped his arms around Stretch’s neck and began caressing his coronal sutures. The larger’s chest rumbled a deep purr as he slowly broke their kiss, “Well,” he panted, “I think that’s a start.” Edge chuckled, "If you say so love."

“I do…” Stretch began to slowly grind against his darling dearest, Edge, his everything,

“Now let me finish”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a headcannon that Stretch flaps his arms whenever he's excited. I honestly think its just a cute quirk he'd have.


	4. Taking All Bets!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our boys have a little argument

Stretch was pissed, and he could definitely be expressing that in a more mature way… He knew that. But Edge definitely wasn't trying all that hard to be the bigger skeleton either. The two were currently fighting over something professionals would call: completely stupid. It had been a long day for both of them, Stretch having been run ragged during a field trip, and Edge having not slept in 60 hours. “Look babe, let's just go to bed. We’ll be better equipped to deal with this in the morning.”

“Oh sure! Lets just go to bed and sleep it off…. NO! I’m not letting you brush this one off, we have to fix this now.”

“Hun..." Stretch moaned tiredly, "I'm about ready to pass out… Please… Let's just leave it.” Stretch flopped face first on the couch in an attempt to hide his scowl, almost half asleep by the time his face hit the cushions. Edge meanwhile was pacing around the living room at speeds that should be impossible. “Stretch you are not allowed to sleep until we put this **_FUCKER_ ** together!!” The Syved display cabinet was strewn about the living room half assembled, with Edge now back to kneeling in the center trying to find the next screw. 

_Fucking Ikea furniture…_ Stretch was so tired, and so done, “BABE, ITS A FUCKING CABINET, It’s not the end of the world if we leave it out for the night.” Stretch sat up from the couch angrily, “And in case you haven’t noticed, we’re both fucking burnt out!!!”

Edge paused his searching to stare Stretch in the eyelights, “I CAN’T TAKE A BREAK UNTIL WE DEAL WITH THIS… YOU DON'T JUST FUCKING LEAVE A JOB HALF DONE! BECUASE NEXT THING YOU KNOW ITS BEEN SITTING IN THE SAME SPOT FOR SIX MONTHS!!” His voice cracked as frustrated tears started pricking at his sockets. However anyone could see Edge was on his last legs in the way he overtiredly stumbled around.

Stretch sighed, and exhausted expression of his own settling on his face, “Look. Bud. I don’t wanna fight over this, It’s stupid. But on the other hand I’m about ready to throw you through a window…” Edge resumed his pacing, though he never broke eye contact with the other, “Pfft, as if you could even get ahold of me”

The other surveyed his lover, observing the obvious bags under his sockets, his slightly slumped posture, and about a dozen other tells that Edge was stupidly sleep-depriving himself again, "I’m pretty sure I could beat the stuffing outta you if I wanted short stuff.” Stretch stood up to his full height driving his point home.

Edge laughed haughtily, The sound coming out as more of a huff than anything resembling laughter, “Yeah right, Mr. Honey-Sticks-For-Bones” He proceeded to stand right in front of Stretch and poke his sternum, “You may be a good 13 inches taller than me, but I’d still whoop your untrained ass.”

“Come on sugar, I’m sure you could hold your own for a bit… But all I’d have to do is sit on you and I’d win.” At that Edge broke out into an angry flush, “PROVE IT THEN!!! LETS GO!” He stormed out of the house, and into their backyard. Stretch released a heavy sigh and followed after him. He stepped into the backyard only to see Edge getting into a fighting stance, “Whoever pins the other for 10 seconds first decides what we do about that fucking cabinet.” 

“Your on you sexy fucker” Unfortunately both skeletons were too tired and angry to fully appreciate the scene they had created. Both were swaying tiredly and glaring daggers across the yard at the other. Fortunately, their neighbors were happy to observe them. Carol and her wife were currently watching the two through one of their second story windows, drinking tea and placing bets.

Back to the half dead skeletons; Stretch was wearing his boyfriend as a backpack as Edge tried to bring him down, his guard training mostly forgotten by his exhausted brain. Suddenly Stretch managed to get a firm grip on the back of Edge’s shirt and yank him off. Holding his angry partner at arms length as he clawed at his arm like a feral cat, Stretch fell forward, landing on top of the other. “Gotcha babe, you’ve got ten seconds.” Stretch started counting as Edge flailed angrily underneath him, “Get...OFF!!” Stretch had only made it to the count of 5 before Edge managed to wiggle free, “HAHAHA!!! YOU’LL HAVE TO TRY HARDER THAN THAT YOU OVERGROWN CHEETO!” as Stretch tried standing up Edge pounced, tackling him to the ground. After a considerable amount of struggling and rolling around, Edge managed to get Stretch into a sleeper hold, “What, no snarky ass comeback?” He teased, “GAAAAK!” Stretch flapped his arms around, hoping that he could dislodge the other’s iron grip from his cervical vertebrae, 

~

“If I'm counting properly I think you've got three more seconds till I win our little bet” Carol said casually, “COME ON!! GET UP YOU BIG OAF!!” Kathy shouted at the window.

~

Suddenly Edge released Stretch and brought his hands up to his nasal cavity, “AGGHH… little bitch.. Did you just-”

“Head butt…ugh... your face? Yes.. ahh... you're not hurt…*cough*.. right?” Stretch panted as he caught his breath meanwhile Edge massaged his nasal ridge, “Pfft hardly, let's continue shall we?”

“Indeed, lets…” 

~

“Ohh!! So close!” Kathy gloated, “Hmmph, My money’s still on Edge, little fuckers got pent up rage for days.”

“Haha, yeah, But Stretch is shifty though, I’m sure he’ll pull through in the end” Carol rubbed her chin in contemplation, “Personally I’m just wondering if they’ll whip out blue magic this time around.”

~

“FUCKER!!!” Edge shouted as Stretch barely dodged his latest lunge. “Heh, Come on babe, chill out.” Edge charged again, only for Stretch to sidestep at the last moment, leaving Edge to trip and subsequently face plant into the grass as he missed. Edge felt something press into the center of his back, keeping him on the ground, “Come on Hot stuff, give up. Lets go to bed.” Edge writhed under the others foot trying to knock the other off balance, “NEVER!! I WILL NOT BE BESTED BY A GODDAMN CABINET!!!” Stretch felt his soul turn blue and heard the accompanying ping, “Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiit…”

He was flung across the yard landing in a tired heap of bones and not getting up. Edge laughed haughtily, counting as he stalked up to the other. “It would seem I have bested you this time Honeybun!” Edge stopped counting as stretch continued not to move, “Stretch?” Edge ran up and flipped the other onto his back, still getting no response. “Stretch?!? Get up lazyass… I-I didn’t throw you that hard did I?? STRETCH!!!” Edge hugged his lover, clinging desperately to his ribcage listening for his soulbeat.

Suddenly, Stretch snapped back to life, pinning a very surprised Edge flat on his back and holding his wrists on either side of his skull. “Gotcha Edgy-Boy” Stretch stuck out his tongue at the other, “That was low and you know it..” he groused. “All’s fair in love, war, and Ikea furniture baby.” 

~

“OH COME ON!!!!” Carol shouted, “SOMEONE CALL HIM ON THAT!!! WHERE’S THE REF WHEN YOU NEED EM SERIOUSLY?!?!?” Kathy laughed good naturedly as she grabbed her wife’s hand, come on, I won our little bet so now I get to pick where we go for dinner. “Uggg… Fine. You’re lucky your cute or I’d insist on a rematch”

“Sure you would, now go get changed, we're headed to Chilis”

~

Stretch rubbed soothing circles into his boyfriend's back as he carried him through the living room and up the stairs. “I want you to know I’m unhappy.” Edge pouted, “Unhappy or not I won and now we are going to sleep.”

“I know I know… I just need you to know I’m angry about it.” Stretch hugged the other tighter, “Of course you are Snuggles, now come on, bedtime.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate Chapter Title:  
> Everything Changed When The Ikea Nation Attacked
> 
> Also I would die for Kathy and Carol.


	5. Love My Words Can't Express

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The babies share a quiet moment together

The wind was blowing softly, guiding raindrops toward the brightly lit windows of the neighborhood homes resting in the summer evening. The sky was a soft grey, lined in a drowsy purple that transitioned into a lush pink. A light fog had spread among the neighborhood streets, muffling the small bit of ambient sound that could be heard from the houses as they wound down for the evening. Outside, frogs made their little frog noises, hoping desperately to find their little frog mate with whom they’d make many tadpoles. Crickets made their own music, also trying to summon a lover for the evening. A lone owl hooted softly, as it searched for its next meal. Said meal scampered about the grass hoping in vain it could remain undetected. Angelic halos hovered around the few street lights that were scattered about the quiet community providing light for the pensive teen who often strolled the streets at night, enjoying the sounds and sights.

The exhausted individual strolled through the neighborhood, briefly glancing at the Skeleton house, named such by the surrounding houses due to its occupants. That being Stretch and Edge. Said skeleton’s were currently in their shared bedroom, lounging on their queen-sized bed. Edge was reading his most recently acquired murder mystery novel, glasses taped to his skull and perched on his nasal ridge. He leaned against the headboard, completely riveted to the pages as he absorbed every detail trying to figure out who did it. Stretch was listening to the lo-fi hip hop playlist that was his current musical hyperfixation, sprawled out across both the mattress and Edge’s lap. He closed his sockets, allowing the soft beats to bounce around the room and his mind, letting his thoughts come and go as they pleased.

The gentle rhythms were perfect for the two. Their quiet nature meant that they never distracted Edge from his reading, but the interesting compositions guided and focused Stretch’s eclectic thoughts. The atmosphere was one of soft meditative peace, and something the monster’s enjoyed deeply.

Stretch especially enjoyed these moments, it was rare that he could settle his body and mind for very long. But every once and a while the angel had mercy and granted him a few hours to relax and explore his mind. One moment he was thinking about what the best color was, and then he remembered how they’d need to buy blueberries next time they went shopping. After a while of thinking about horses he considered Edge, beautiful, smart, cute, spicy, wonderful, Edge. The love of his life, the most precious part of his world. _How on earth am I supposed to get across how much I love you?_ He wondered, _God, there aren’t words that can describe how much I love him, and there’s no way I can express it fully before I die_

Stretch swore he felt a small ache in his soul at the thought. Truly it would be nigh impossible for either individual to truly express the oceanic depths of their love for one another. And this thought weighed heavily on them from time to time. _UUGH!! This is so unfair, He’s the shining sun of my life, my reason for fighting, everything I aspire to be, perfection incarnate, A glistening ruby, radiating pure joy, so dazzling and bright in its splendor that sometimes I have to look away so as not to be completely blinded by its brilliance. A beacon in the darkness, guiding me through the dismal void that is life, and shining a light on everything good from flowers, to capri-sun you are the reason I can smile at the little things. You radiant motherfucker._

“Can I help you?” Edge inquired, startling Stretch out of his head and bringing him back into the real world. 

“Uhhhh…” Stretch desperately wanted to tell Edge what he’d been thinking, to swaddle him in his love and care so nothing could ever upset or hurt him, he wanted to do so many things for Edge, unfortunately his tongue had other ideas, refusing to work properly. “Uhhhhh….”

Edge looked up from his book needing to rest his eyelights, only to be met by Stretch staring at him with enough sparkles and hearts in his eyelights to sicken even a five year old girl. At first he was transfixed by them, lost in the mesmerizing swirls and shimmers. After who knows how long, Edge snapped out of his daze and confronted the other. Of course he did it as passive aggressively as possible though _Uggh, Why am I so emotionally constipated?!? The guy is staring at you as if you're the last drop of honey in the world and you attack him like he ate the last doughnut at work. Lord Stretch why do you look at me like that? You deserve someone who can give back every bit of love you give them…_ it was in that moment that Edge realized that Stretch was still droning his ‘uhhhh’ from earlier. With a small chuckle, he removed his glasses, placing both them and his book on his nightstand. “Stretch…” The other stopped droning and looked up at Edge. _god there are so many things I wanna say… you’re stunning, I love literally everything about you, your smile could melt the ice caps, im sorry I’m not enough, I wish I could make you understand how deeply I mean it when I say ‘I love you’_ “Stretch I…” 

Edge lunged forward, wrapping his arms around the other’s ribcage, and nuzzling his face into his hoodie. In response Stretch let out a gentle laugh and hugged him back. “Mmm ovpfh oooo” Edge mumbled, neglecting to remove his skull from the hoodie to which it was pressed. “I love you too cuddle bug” Stretch whispered.

  
He then shifted slightly, curling himself around the other as best he could. Meanwhile Edge adjusted his own grip, holding Stretch even tighter than before. Both Skeletons then lay on the bed, slowly falling asleep in one another's arms, each one thinking the same thing, _‘I hope this tells you everything my words can’t_ _express'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a lonely aeromantic who wishes she could have something like this... Indulge me.


	6. dReAmS aRe WeIrD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stretch dreams, and Edge hopes.

Stretch sat at his sentry station, sockets glazed over with boredom as he waited for his brother to come by again as he patrolled the forest. Usually he’d see Sans two to three times during his shift. And if the shorter skeleton made a point of keeping his brother focused on his work while he was there that was nobody’s business. As he waited, Stretch stared off into the forest, watching the trees shift and sway, mesmerized by the hypnotic beauty of the snow that fell off the jostled branches.

Suddenly, he blinked and he was home. The kitchens heat sunk deep into his bones, quickly chasing away the chill of the forest. Looking down revealed a hot stove, some bread, French toast batter, and a piece already sizzling away in the pan. Unaware of how he got there, and frighteningly unconcerned about that fact, he quickly used up the rest of the batter, enjoying the scent of cinnamon and vanilla as it wafted about. Having smelt it, now it was his duty to delt it, so he served his brother. Soaking up his praise and beaming smile like a sponge in water. 

Stretch took a bite of his own serving, a bit surprised when he was met with the zesty punch of Indian food instead of the fluffy sweetness he expected. Opening his sockets revealed that he was now sitting at his and Edge’s shared dinner table, “What do you think, not too spicy is it?” Trying not to cough up the unexpected flavor and offend his lover, stretch choked on his food for a second, quickly chasing it down with some milk. “Heh, nah, It’s perfect Edgelord” Stretch took another bite to prove his point, only to swallow nothing as his chair, boyfriend, and dining room all faded away into a colorful smoke. Falling into the now white void, Stretch enjoyed the feeling of wind against his skull as he fell through the blank void surrounding him. His body spun and twirled gently as he blissfully careened for what seemed to be infinity. Eventually, he landed. A bit disappointed that the fall was already over, he tried to take flight, flexing the muscles he knew should be there and trying to remember how to do something he never should have forgotten. He stumbled a few times, moon jumping instead of soaring as he knew he could, the wings he couldn't see just wouldn't work. But he could feel them pumping and straining so he kept trying, believing that eventually his efforts would be rewarded.

Someone called out to him, their voice bringing color and focus back to the void. Stretch, now grounded, looked for the voice's owner, finding only that he was back in Snowdin Town. Specifically he was standing on the outskirts, where one could meet The Riverperson from time to time. Lucky him, they were just pulling up to the riverbank singing their mysterious song. He got onto their boat, asking if they could take him to hotland, It was about time he visited Undyne. As they rode The Riverperson sang absentmindedly, Stretch enjoyed the quiet sound this time around so he paid attention as they bobbed along the river. “Tra-la-la It’s hard to reach out to someone when you’ve lost your hands Tra-la-la” 

  
“Wait, what?” Stretch was unsettled by that for a reason he didn't understand, “What's that supposed to mean?”

  
“Tra-la-la Flowers grow best where there is light and water Tra-la-la”

Stretch sat bolt upright, drenched in sweat and breathing heavily. The details of his dream quickly faded but left a grossly persistent sense of dread and emptiness. A feeling that was all too familiar to him. Taking deep breaths, Stretch rested his head into his hands, trying to ground himself in reality, and not get too caught up in why he felt this way. All he remembered was falling, and how nice it had felt, he knew there was more and he knew that the part he couldn't remember was why he felt so shitty but he couldn’t jog his memory no matter how hard he tried. “Well…” He muttered, “If you can’t remember, Just forget the whole thing.” With that he carefully got out of bed, doing his best not to disturb Edge and traveled down to the kitchen.

It was there that he found his balm, in the form of a bear shaped bottle. Hoping that a light buzz would be enough to calm his frazzled nerves, (But knowing that it wouldn’t) Stretch took a few sips, letting the sticky sweet flavor drown out the unidentified troubles that pulsed through his soul. As he leaned against the counter he started out, blankly noting how the kitchen looked in the evening light. Yellow beams shone in from the living-room window casting a gentle glow into the adjacent rooms. Stretch could see dust particles dancing within, momentarily enraptured with the sparkly specks. After an indeterminable amount of time, boney calves broke his focus. 

“How long have you been u- Stretch… That was a full bottle” Stretch blinked slowly, glancing at the now empty honey bottle in his hands Huh… When did that happen?, “I suppose it was full at one point huh.” Edge sighed dramatically, snatching the bottle out of his hands and placing it on the counter, “I don’t know what’s brought this on, but you are coming to bed. I’m getting as much water in you as I can, and then we’re going to either sleep or talk about this… It depends on how long you can refrain from passing out” 

Stretch felt like an ass, Edge hated it when he drank. Scratch that, Edge hated it when he drank sad. Understandable of course, he did tend to go overboard when he was distracted, but that doesn’t change the fact that he needed a distraction. One of these days Stretch knew he’d push things too far, and Edge would leave him. So he promised himself he wouldn’t be doing this again. (knowing full well he didn’t have the impulse control to keep it)

A cold thing smacked him in the skull, “Drink up dipshit” Edge called out as he went about getting himself into bed. Lookin into his lap Stretch saw a water bottle, now he may be… inebriated, but he knew what to do with this. He downed the whole bottle, capped it, set it aside, and flopped back onto the bed. “Wanna talk now?” Edge asked, “ZZZzzzzzZZZZ” Stretch was already asleep. 

_Ugg. of course, why can’t he just let me help him! I dont care if he wants to drink himself stupid, I just hate that we never address this FREQUENT ISSUE because he never remembers anything after he wakes up again. Edge lay back on the bed, allowing himself to go back to sleep again. Whatever, we’ll deal with this eventually. Even he can dodge this issue forever...._

_Right?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so tired right now good lord. I hope I captured the sensation of dreaming well.

**Author's Note:**

> So just in case you couldn't tell, after he "Lost it" Edge went ape shit on those two fuckers, he was roofied so he probably won't remember it all (Though he isn't stupid so he'll be able to piece the basic story together) but he fought like an animal, biting clawing and showing no fucking mercy. To offset legal ramifications, Edge did leave them alive, though barely, and they're probably missing a few fingers if not a hand. When they wake up, in the E.R., they tell no one anything out of sheer terror of what Edge would do to them.
> 
> And those two lived miserably ever after drowning in financial debt and medical bills, never hurting anyone ever again.
> 
> Edge and Stretch woke up, showerd, tended their wounds and then ate a nice breakfast courtesy of Stretch.


End file.
